| Life is like one of those choose your own adventure stories... |
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| Note to California friends: |
[06 Dec 2009|08:51am] |
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I am coming back to visit again. Dan and I will be driving down around Dec 14 and then starting our trip back up approx Dec 28. Hopefully I will get to see some of your lovely faces!
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| HI CALIFORNIA |
[15 Sep 2009|10:04pm] |
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I AM COMING TO SEE YOU TOMORROW!
I touch down in the fine land of Oaks between 5 and 6p, I think. I take off to come back to the land of Port Sunday, leaving CA ~4p or something. Most of my time will be taken up by family, + have plans to attend Lyssette's bday party with Caylin (yes it is steampunk themed, and we should maybe go thrifting before the party which starts at 9p Sat), however I would love to spend some good quality time with other folks (anyone wanna go to Sansar or Lemongrass? watch anime/Fern Gully on my computer and doodle?) and possible make it to SC if I am feeling capable of making the trip - dunno if that'll be for a day or overnight, it will depend on if I've come with anyone and if there's anyplace to stay, I think...
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| hi journal |
[23 Aug 2009|10:37am] |
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how is it going?
life is going okay for me.
by okay i mean pretty good, actually!
since i last updated, in no particular order where + = good, - = bad, and / = neutral:
-Piper has died, that is sad :( i miss her. my way of dealing with this is to do something morbid, aka skin her and preserve her skin, and have one of the folks @ my work prepare her skull for me to keep. this hasn't happened yet, right now Piper's body is living in said person's freezer that also houses other dead fuzzies (mostly roadkill) which she prepares for natural history purposes.
+i am feeling more hopeful about possibilities for employment after americorps ends.
+hanging out with lots of cool people, folks from work, friends from OKCupid, etc
-don't have enough time to hang out with everyone i'd like to hang out with
/almost bought a house with Dan, but he got cold feet. i understand though because my job situation isn't the best, and he isn't supersecure about his job either
+got to see Ben and Kore and meet some of Ben's sibs, had a good time
+got to see Bloom on her way to Seattle-area, happy she will be close and happy to have a reason to visit Seattle-area
-my vagina itches and my nuvaring keeps slipping out
-still haven't gotten my oregon driver's license though i've been here almost a year, hoping to really actually do it the saturday after next
+got to see my parents, they took Dan and I to Timberline and spoiled us with good booze and good food and good fun times
+work is going a lot better, at least team dynamics-wise
-still having a hard time trying to get folks to sign up to have their property restored
+now that i am not so stressed out about some work things (pesticide test, prepping for block party) i have had the time to read a bunch of fun fantasy novels. i think i've read at least 4 in the past 4 weeks, also have begun haphazardly rereading some other stuff
/been upping my meat intake. while my parents were here i tried some bites of their meatfoods, and last night i was at a coworkers house where pork, chicken and smoked oysters were served (among some delectable veggie dishes)... i had 2 oysters, a chicken leg, and a bite of pork. i liked it. plus i am starting to feel that milk products, beans (incl soy), egg, and salted nuts don't have to be my only options for protein all the time)
/been trying to be more "healthy" as far as watching what i eat, counting calories, trying to be more active. finding it difficult. now only sort of half trying. don't think i've lost or gained a significant amount of weight since ending high school though, when i jumped from being 120-5 to 130-5. need to start being more accountable to myself regarding this, but find it hard when i eat out, or since Dan does the cooking (which i don't really care to change since what he cooks is good!), or blah blah blah excuses.
/been getting back into drawing, so far as looking at art on elfwood/internet again, reading tutorials, went to a life-drawing meetup... however haven't actually started properly devoting time to drawing yet - hope to being on that today
/see above but with writing also - been reading more, but this post is the first non-work/email related writing i've done since, um, last post in what, mid june?
anyways that's all for now. i will write soon, i hope, need to put down all my thoughts re: future options down somewhere.
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| hard time dealing |
[24 Jun 2009|10:35pm] |
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life is too much for me to deal with lately.
piper is sick, i failed a test for work, i'm tired all the time and i have a lot of bills and not a lot of money.
i just want to cry and wail and withdraw from everything for awhile but i can't so oh well.
dan is the only reason anything gets done around the house lately and i feel really worthless and angry at myself. i feel like i should start counseling, but i don't think i can afford it. also i feel like i need to start living my life differently somehow but it is so hard to break out of old patterns, even when they are making life more difficult for me.
i don't know what to do.
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| shit |
[28 May 2009|11:50pm] |
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so i guess when your housemate tells you to flush the toilet before you take a big shit because they left some tissues/teepee n boogers in the bowl, you actually should listen to them instead of doing what i did and taking a crap anyways. otherwise you get a toiletbowl full to the brim of shit soup and when you're drunk and have to piss the joke's on you. because really, it is your responsibility to flush other peoples' tissues down the toilet before you take a shit.
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| a to do list |
[26 Apr 2009|08:56am] |
in which I write all the things I hope to accomplish today, so that I can refer to it when I get distracted by other things (like livejournal...?!)
highest priority:
clean ferret litterbox/cage
send out e-mail to portland-friends and those of nearby areas to inform of b-day get together
the rest in no particular order:
do my chores (sweep hallway & kitchen, wipedown kitchen counter)
do the rest of the dishes
bring up the laundry from the dryer
do more laundry?
go grocery shopping
(need: eggs, 'nanas, veggies for the week, anything else??? maybe more fake jerkey...)
decide which snack bars are coming to work with me and put them all in one box or paper bag
email bloom
and...
other stuff?
want to:
have a happy special date with dan if he still wants to try to do it today
if not...
see jeremy playing with sticks (shinai...sp?) at the park
have a phone conversation with caylin
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| my response to the coments on http://www.infowars.com/mandatory-service-bill-lives-on/ |
[25 Apr 2009|09:25am] |
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My life as an Americorps member...
I wear a uniform! It is a gray t-shirt, gray sweatshirt, and green vest.
I work in a program funded by government money. I am an Americorps member through the Northwest Service Academy.
My program's main goal is not public safety, but it could be construed that way. I work to restore degraded streamside habitat near and on private property. The people whose property we work on have all agreed to let us work on their property, and sometimes they even pay money to have their land restored! Why? Because flood events have caused serious erosion and down-cutting of banks that, if left as-is, would eventually cause people's houses to fall apart! I work for the safety of salmon and all residents (human and nonhuman) of a certain watershed, by planting native plants near streams and thus reducing established TMDLs (total maximum daily loads) of temperature, and hopefully various toxins such a dieldin, lead, fecal coliform bacteria... that are in the waterways. Reducing how? Well... more streamside plants = more shade. More streamside plants = less erosion. More streamside plants = more percolation and filtration of groundwater.
I will receive an education award for my work - if I complete the required number of service hours, I will get approximately $4500 to spend on further schooling.
Americorps already has programs centered around various public safety issues. Americorps trained me in First Aid and CPR! Now I can help you if you are choking, break your arm, are suffering heatstroke...
Why is everyone so afraid? I mean, the text of the bill states "6) Whether a workable, fair, and reasonable mandatory service requirement for all able young people could be developed, and how such a requirement could be implemented in a manner that would strengthen the social fabric of the Nation and overcome civic challenges by bringing together people from diverse economic, ethnic, and educational backgrounds."
Whether means "a question involving alternatives"
Fair means "marked by impartiality and honesty : free from self-interest, prejudice, or favoritism"
Could, I think here means "if it's possible"...
I mean... goodness forbid that people who have different life experiences, different levels of wealth, different opinions about gun control, different skin colors... work together towards common goals?!
I understand on a conceptual level why everyone here is freaking out, but I think you are all letting your fear (oh goodness, yes, I said it... "FEAR") run away with your rationality and take control.
Worse comes to worse, you could all run away to Canada... right? ;)
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| language error |
[23 Apr 2009|10:48am] |
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Today I read a typo: "suppervision" and I thought, "oh, that's like dinner-view, right?" And then I wondered about the applicability of that term or maybe "soupervision". "I am starving, I have total suppervision... all I can focus on is dinner!"
Whee work...
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| B-day Calculator & Life Path 3 info |
[19 Apr 2009|02:18pm] |
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3 May 1984
Your date of conception was on or about 11 August 1983 which was a Thursday.
You were born on a Thursday
under the astrological sign Taurus.
Your Life path number is 3.
Your fortune cookie reads:
You will be invited to an exciting event.
Life Path Compatibility:
You are most compatible with those with the Life Path numbers 3, 6 & 9.
You should get along well with those with the Life Path numbers 1, 2, 5 & 11.
You are least compatible with those with the Life Path numbers 4, 7, 8 & 22.
The Julian calendar date of your birth is 2445823.5.
The golden number for 1984 is 9.
The epact number for 1984 is 27.
The year 1984 was a leap year.
Your birthday falls into the Chinese year beginning 2/2/1984 and ending 2/19/1985.
You were born in the Chinese year of the Rat.
Your Native American Zodiac sign is Beaver; your plant is Wild Clover.
You were born in the Egyptian month of Epipy, the third month of the season of Shomu (Harvest).
Your date of birth on the Hebrew calendar is 1 Iyyar 5744.
Or if you were born after sundown then the date is 2 Iyyar 5744.
The Mayan Calendar long count date of your birthday is 12.18.10.16.19 which is
12 baktun 18 katun 10 tun 16 uinal 19 kin
The Hijra (Islamic Calendar) date of your birth is Thursday, 2 Sha'ban 1404 (1404-8-2).
The date of Easter on your birth year was Sunday, 22 April 1984.
The date of Orthodox Easter on your birth year was Sunday, 22 April 1984.
The date of Ash Wednesday (the first day of Lent) on your birth year was Wednesday 7 March 1984.
The date of Whitsun (Pentecost Sunday) in the year of your birth was Sunday 10 June 1984.
The date of Whisuntide in the year of your birth was Sunday 17 June 1984.
The date of Rosh Hashanah in the year of your birth was Tuesday, 25 September 1984.
The date of Passover in the year of your birth was Sunday, 15 April 1984.
The date of Mardi Gras on your birth year was Tuesday 6 March 1984.
As of 4/19/2009 5:13:44 PM EDT
You are 24 years old.
You are 299 months old.
You are 1,303 weeks old.
You are 9,117 days old.
You are 218,825 hours old.
You are 13,129,513 minutes old.
You are 787,770,824 seconds old.
Celebrities who share your birthday:
Greg Raposo (1985) Christopher Cross (1951) Doug Henning (1947)
Frankie Valli (1937) James Brown (1933) Sugar Ray Robinson (1921)
Pete Seeger (1919) Bing Crosby (1903) Golda Meir (1898)
Niccolo Machiavelli (1469)
Top songs of 1984
Like a Virgin by Madonna When Doves Cry by Prince
Jump by Van Halen Footloose by Kenny Loggins
What's Love Got to Do with It by Tina Turner Against All Odds by Phil Collins
I Just Called to Say I Love You by Stevie Wonder Ghostbusters by Ray Parker Jr.
Karma Chameleon by Culture Club Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go by Wham!
Your age is the equivalent of a dog that is 3.56829745596869 years old. (Life's just a big chewy bone for you!)
Your lucky day is Friday.
Your lucky number is 6.
Your ruling planet(s) is Venus.
Your lucky dates are 6th, 15th, 24th.
Your opposition sign is Scorpio.
Your opposition number(s) is 9 & 11.
Today is not one of your lucky days!
There are 14 days till your next birthday
on which your cake will have 25 candles.
Those 25 candles produce 25 BTUs,
or 6,300 calories of heat (that's only 6.3000 food Calories!) .
You can boil 2.86 US ounces of water with that many candles.
In 1984 there were approximately 3.6 million births in the US.
In 1984 the US population was approximately 226,545,805 people, 64.0 persons per square mile.
In 1984 in the US there were 2,487,000 marriages (10.5%) and 1,155,000 divorces (4.9%)
In 1984 in the US there were approximately 1,990,000 deaths (8.8 per 1000)
In the US a new person is born approximately every 8 seconds.
In the US one person dies approximately every 12 seconds.
In 1984 the population of Australia was approximately 15,677,282.
In 1984 there were approximately 234,034 births in Australia.
In 1984 in Australia there were approximately 108,655 marriages and 43,124 divorces.
In 1984 in Australia there were approximately 109,914 deaths.
Your birth flower is LILY
Your birthstone is Emerald
The Mystical properties of Emerald
Though not meant to replace traditional medical treatment, Emerald is used for physical and emotional healing.
Some lists consider these stones to be your birthstone. (Birthstone lists come from Jewelers, Tibet, Ayurvedic Indian medicine, and other sources)
Agate, Chrysoprase
Your birth tree is
Poplar, the Uncertainty
Looks very decorative, no self-confident behaviour, only courageous if necessary, needs goodwill and pleasant surroundings, very choosy, often lonely, great animosity, artistic nature, good organiser, tends to philosophy, reliable in any situation, takes partnership serious.
There are 250 days till Christmas 2009!
There are 263 days till Orthodox Christmas!
The moon's phase on the day you were
born was waxing crescent.
Calculate your b-day info here: http://www.paulsadowski.com/birthday.asp
3 (3, 12/3, 21,/3, 30/3)
The Life Path 3 indicates that you entered this plane with a strong sense of creativity and with wonderful communication skills. Achievement for you most likely comes through engaging your ingenious expression. A truly gifted 3 possesses the most exceptional innovative skills, normally in the verbal realm, writing, speaking, acting, or similar endeavors. Here we are apt to find the entertainers of the world, bright, effervescent, sparkling people with very optimistic attitudes. The bright side of this path stresses harmony, beauty and pleasures; of sharing your inventive talents with the world. Capturing your capability in creative self-expression is the highest level of attainment for this life path.
Life is generally lived to the fullest, often without much worry about tomorrow. You are not very good at handling money because of a general lack of concern about it. You spend it when you have it and don't when you don't.
The 3 loves connecting with people. The characteristics of the 3 are warmth and friendliness, a good conversationalist, social and open. A good talker both from the standpoint of being a delight to listen to, but even more importantly, one who has the ability to listen to others. Accordingly, the life path 3 produces individuals who are always a welcome addition to any social situation and know how to make others feel at home. The approach to life tends to be exceedingly positive. Your disposition is almost surely sunny and openhearted. A happy and often inspired person, you are constantly seeking and needing the stimuli of similar people.
There is a remote side to your 3 Life Path, as well. This comes as a surprise to the native and to those who think they are well acquainted. The 3 is actually a very sensitive soul. When hurt, you can easily retreat to a shell of morose silence for extended periods. Nonetheless, the 3 eventually copes with all of the many setbacks that occur in life and readily bounces back for more. It is usually easy for you to deal with problems because you can freely admit the existence of problems without letting them get you down for too long. Because of your own sensitivity to hurt, you have a caring disposition and seem to be very conscious of other people's feelings and emotions.
In romance, the 3 is a very ardent and loyal lover. Affairs that don't go well can leave scares that seem to linger. Emotional experiences of all sorts tend to deeply touch the 3 and the drama may take some time to play out. Regrettably, the giving disposition of the 3 often attracts demanding partners. As with most of life's issues for the 3 Life Path, balance in relationships is illusive.
Your big test with a 3 Life Path is controlling your highs and lows. You won't survive very well in any routine environment or when you are placed under dominating management. Slow thinking and overly contemplative people tend to frustrate you, and you don't function too well with this type whether you are working for, with, or under them. Your exuberant nature can take you far, especially if you are ever able to focus your energies and talents.
For the few living on the negative side of this Life Path, a 3 may be so delighted with the joy of living that the life becomes frivolous and superficial. You may scatter your abilities and express little sense of purpose. The 3 can be an enigma, for no apparent reason you may become moody and tend to retreat. Escapist tendencies are not uncommon with the 3 life path, and you find it very hard to settle into one place or one position. Guard against being critical of others,
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| life and dreams |
[19 Apr 2009|09:14am] |
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This past week has been one of my most favorites since moving to Portland.
I had a great time at my job - by which I mean I used some development hours (hours Americorps gives us to do non-work things that can lead to future jobs, i.e. non-work related volunteering, updating resume, filling out applications to grad school, going to conferences or trainings, etc). I used my development hours to do different biological surveys - first, Spotted Towhee (Pipilo maculatus) surveys in a park in Lake Oswego, then western painted turtle (Chrysemys picta ssp. bellii) and frog & salamander/tadpole/egg mass surveys (Red-legged frogs: Rana aurora, Pacific Tree Frogs: Pseudacris regilla, and any/all evidence of salamanders).
I worked a lot this week, an hour and a half overtime on Friday and 6 hours yesterday in addition to my regular 40h workweek. Not my favorite thing to do, but it wasn't horrible.
Also, the general mood at work has been a bit lighter lately (especially Thurs & Fri) and that makes me really happy!
This last week I also had a great time after work. Tuesday night, one of my coworkers invited Dan and I over for a dinner party, and we had some delicious bread appetizers (think toasts, one with butter + pesto + something else, I think some kind of cheese, and the other with melted gouda and maybe something else on top), salad, and vegetarian lasagna, with pineapple for "Dessert". There was also some great wine, which I probably had about 4 glasses too much (too many?) of. It was awesome!
The next night, the same coworker and 2 of her friends met up with Dan and I at the Laurelthirst Public House, and we saw Laura Veirs play, with Colin Malloy as her guest (I think I mentioned this in my previous post).
Life lately has been altogether fantastic, except, unfortunately, Dan and I have been having some relationship stress due to my nonmonogamous nature. :/ I'm not quite sure if the issue is resolved, but it's at least been discussed and I think we're letting it rest for awhile.
Last night, I had the first dream about pulling that I ever remember having. I am sort of disturbed.
...
And lastly, another thing I've really been enjoying lately is getting back in touch with my mystical spirituality. I'm reading a couple of books on tarot and doing some (sort of) meditative activities with the cards. I also semi-recently bought myself a new set of runes. Now, if only I could find my rune books! I'm pretty sure they're in Livermore somewhere, but my parents have looked around my bookshelves and can't seem to find them. I will have to look when I visit town. - Still planning on coming down over Memorial Day Weekend, but plans may be shifting, so I will let everyone know if they change.
...
Oh, oh! P.S.! Dan and I had a really awesome date last night - walked downtown together, dropped some books off at the library, then he bought me a really awesome dinner and I just had a really good time! Then we walked back home and hung out with cousin Megan, then went to bed. When I write it down like that it doesn't sound as fantastic as it was, but that's because I left out: a) walking by some prom and taking a moment to dance together on the sidewalk, b) discussing a possible vacation (or maybe "staycation") for us later this year, and c) making out for a minute on the Hawthorne bridge as we walked home. Not to mention he is a great boyfriend and sometimes (aka often) carries my purse or bag when I tire of it. ^_^
Aaaaand we also had a really good date a few weeks ago - dinner together at Riyadh's (Lebanese place a block away from our house), a stop at the comic book store where I picked up Sandman #5 and put in an order for soft-cover Kabuki #5(...which I still haven't gotten a call about...), then we saw Slumdog Millionaire at Bagdad. I really enjoyed it - I was very emotionally involved and I laughed, cried, got annoyed, excited, etc!
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| 15 April 2009 |
[15 Apr 2009|10:14pm] |
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17:49
Hooray! I have a new computer!
For those of you who haven't heard, my old laptop (6 years old or so!) finally pooped out on me. I think, anyways. I didn't know I could possibly get it fixed until I ordered my new computer... so, suffice it to say, I have a new computer. Which I am very excited about.
20:47
I am also excited because I just got home from the Laurelthirst Public House here in Portland where I got to see Laura Veirs play with her "Two Beers Veirs" group. Tonight, their special guest was Colin Malloy.
22:11
Wow, I just spent the last hour plus re-reading all my myspace blogs because my Uncle is on myspace and wants to be my friend. Against my better judgement, I friended him. Mostly because all my blogs are public anyways so it wouldn't make a difference. After that I am far too tired to actually write anything more important than I've already written. I just thought I should update because Caylin recently reminded me that I haven't updated since Feb.
I will try to update about the bigger things going on in my life later, as in tomorrow or another day this week.
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| online quiz |
[08 Feb 2009|08:46pm] |
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"Do You Know the Dark Side of your Personality"
My Result: Miser Among Us
You reveal a tendency toward an obsessive-compulsive personality, which should not be confused with obsessive-compulsive disorder, or OCD. The two are very different, with different traits. A person who displays obsessive-compulsive personality is often rigid and unyielding. A penchant to be neat, tidy and extremely well organized creates a conundrum with the need to be a pack rat and not throw anything away. Often hard-working to the extreme, and spending long hours at work, the earned paycheck is saved except for the most necessary expenses. "Greedy," "stingy" and "perfectionist" are three words that describe someone with an obsessive-compulsive personality disorder.
That explains it.
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| Thank you everyone <3 |
[04 Feb 2009|09:21pm] |
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Thanks guys for the love for Bonnie. I still miss her every day and I wish so much that she could still be with us but I know I didn't want her to be suffering.
Last weekend Dan, his Mom, Scamp and I all went together to the Oregon Ferret Shelter where we picked up a new brother and sister for Scamp. Their names are Oats and Piper. They are both about Scamp's age (he will be ~4 this May) and while they have problems of their own (Oats has a bit of a biting problem and he and Scamp have had some dominance issues, Piper doesn't want to poop in the litterbox before playing, and they both have bad teeth) they are both sweet little creatures with endearing personalities. Oats is very social and smart, and Piper is cuddly as can be. I was worried for awhile that Scamp would not get along with them, but even though he is still sometimes wary of getting too rough with Oats (or of Oats getting too rough with him, I should say), I've seen them all three drink from the same water bottle at the same time, sleep all together in a pile, and follow each other around exploring. I think it's working out well!
The Oregon Ferret Shelter is a wonderful place. So many darling ferrets that need homes. The OFS has listings online where you can see pics of many of the ferrets up for adoption, and read mini-bios about them that tell their age, a little of what their personality is like, and whether or not they are part of a bonded pair with another ferret (as Oats and Piper are). The older ferrets are cheaper than the younger ones, and you get a discount if you adopt two that are bonded. I got both Piper and Oats for $110 and they are both microchipped, up to date on shots, and have a free vet visit which I am taking them to on Saturday.
On a non-ferret note, life is going good in general. I have been very exhausted from my new job as the Heiney Creek Specialist for the City of Gresham (through NWSA Americorps). We finished the last bits of training and orientation last week, and my teammates and I (City of Gresham: Community Engagement Team, what what!) spent the day at Heiney Creek removing Himalayan Blackberry (Rubus discolor) and English Ivy (Hedera helix) from the backyard of Mr. and Mrs. Roche who own property on both sides of the creek. We are going to spend tomorrow and Friday finishing up there, and then I believe next week we will be at my teammate Jess's site, Kelly Creek. My hands are already dry and somewhat blistered, my feet will probably be blistered by the end of the week, and I'm tired and sore!
Since I am working full time and commuting an hour each way to and from work, my schedule is basically: up at 6a, out of the house by 6:30, on the MAX (kind of like a BART/lightrail crossover) at 7:02, arrive at Gresham City Hall by 7:32, work from 7:45a-4:15p, commute home between 4:15-5:30p, have restorative cuddle session with Dan, maybe nap for 10-20 minutes, eat dinner, play with and clean up after ferrets for 1-2h or so, maybe shower or take a bath, MAYBE check email or lj, attempt to be in bed by 9:30p but so far fail and end up getting to sleep between 10 and 11:30p... Repeat... etc.
Dan bought me (and him) a T-Mobile G1 phone last week. It is great except I just found out it charges me text messages for sending/receiving IMs on the built in AIM program which is LAAAAAAAME. Right now I'm on a 400 text message per month plan and I've already used ~300! In 4 days! 90% of that was IMs because I didn't know any better, but still. Anyways, we'll see whether or not I have to get the unlimited text message plan. It's an extra $10 per month. Dan did the math and I can use ~199 texts over my current plan (at $0.05/text) and still be paying less than $10/mo, but part of me just wants to get the unlimited plan and not worry about it.
Anyways, there are cookies in the kitchen and a Dan in my bed, both of which I need to attend to, plus it's already ~9:45p so Adieu, adieu my dears. And goodnight.
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| RIP Bonnie |
[26 Jan 2009|05:44pm] |
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Today I took Bonnie to the vet and had her euthanized. She was approx 7yrs old and was dealing with advanced adrenal disease as well as a variety of possible other issues (gastrointestinal, for one). She had lost much of her weight in the past few months (past few weeks, really) and had become very lethargic and listless. For the past few days, she stopped eating and wasn't drinking much water. Because she wasn't eating, she was metabolizing muscle mass and losing muscle, becoming ever more weak and uncoordinated. So I decided no more. No more meds (she'd been taking metronidazole and another med for the last week, and hating them both), no more tests, no more ...
Now Scamp is an only child. :( I'm sad but I think it was the best thing for my little Bon-Bon.
Pictures coming soon.
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| 11 days later - out of a pointless funk into a reasonable one |
[18 Jan 2009|02:04am] |
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The Crystal Method - "Tough Guy" |
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Here it is, at nearly 2:20am. I am updating my livejournal for the first time in 11 days! Last time I updated, it was slightly less late than this, and I was in a crazy funk. But I am no longer in said funk, and actually haven't been since I woke up after actually going to bed that night. Well, that's good news.
I think I might be in a different sort of funk, though. A bad-health, no-money, sick-pet blues sort of funk.
My health in general is fine. No new major problems. But I have been mildly feverish the past few days. Part of me thinks it might be due to hormones (hi menses! why do you make me so ill?), but I'm also congested/sneezy/mild-sore-throat-y and spaced out. I'm also very weepy lately, which I will definitely blame on the hormones... hormones and stress!
Ah.. the joy of the current economy. Bitch, moan, bitch, moan. I am a lot luckier than a lot of people, but I'm still feeling the pain. I am very blessed to have a job that will be starting soon (Thursday), though I'm sort of anxious about that, too. In any case, even with this job that's beginning, I will likely be eligible for food stamps. Hooray. Besides that, the job should cover all my set bills: rent, internet service, car insurance, cell phone, ... I estimated a high end electricity bill cost based on the bills of the last few months, no problem. I did not factor in a cost for groceries, since I will be applying for food stamps. I remember in my phone interview they told me I could get like $170 worth of food stamps per month. I don't think I spend that much on groceries, though I could be wrong.
Anyways, I've been trying to figure out a budget because Bonnie (my female ferret) is sick. I've known she has adrenal disease for awhile, but it's gotten very bad. She's lost 1/7th of her body weight in the past 3 months, has become very lethargic, doesn't play, and has developed red marks on her skin from all the scratching she does due to her adrenal disease. I took her to the vet today and got blood work done so that we can determine if it is solely adrenal disease that is causing her issues or if she might also have insulinoma (ferret insulin problems, sort of like hypoglycemia/opposite of diabetes). A high end estimate for adrenal treatment is $80/month. The high end estimate for insulinoma treatment is about the same. So if she has both of these problems and I need to get her monthly treatment for both, that is about $160/month (barely more than the cost of a brand new baby ferret! but I love my Bonnie).
My stipend from Americorps is supposed to be something like $1009/month. I don't know if their health plan costs anything, but I'm planning on ditching my current (California-based) plan for theirs... hopefully it's cheap or free! Also I don't know how much money I will have taken out for taxes. Hopefully something small, if anything, since I won't be making much.
So using all my bills and my handy-dandy dashboard calculator, I figured that including everything except groceries, I will be spending a set $801/month. Oh, that's not including the cost of birth control, either. On my current health plan, I pay $10/mo for that, but I don't know if that will change if I get on the Americorps health plan.
That leaves about $200 for non-food necessities, emergencies/random bills (like Oregon car registration/license fees, driver's test fees, all of which I still need to get/take), savings, and fun. I think I have to stop going out to dinner/the movies/things that cost money, now. Ideally, I'd like to save at least $100/month.
I'm SO not getting that iPhone I wanted... In fact I'm thinking of trying to use my barely-existent math skills to determine whether or not changing from my current phone plan to a prepaid plan might save me some $. As it is, this month I've used 70 of the 450 any time minutes I'm paying for. -_- AT&T, you are so NOT worth it. I need the "loser who never talks on the phone" plan ASAP.
Oh well, at this point I'll be thankful and look on the bright side because at least I'm not in debt!
Not to anyone but Dan that is, who kindly paid our (yes, our...) car insurance for the next 6 months in full and is allowing me to pay him back for the cost of my car's insurance (cheaper than his) monthly. And who also pays all of the rent on the first of every month and allows me to write him a check mid monthly or a little later to pay him back for my portion. And who takes me out to dinner and buys me drinks and a lot of times doesn't make me pay him back! <3 I'm so lucky!
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| You know it's time for me to sleep when... |
[07 Jan 2009|01:49am] |
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mood |
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lonely |
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Occasionally I get in moods. Certain specific moods. Tonight was one of those occasions. I am feeling lonely, alone, whatever. I feel somewhere between not-myself and more myself than I have been in years. A few years ago I started being that person I thought I should be, thought I wanted to be. I, you know, talked to people. Made actual in the flesh friends. Not that I didn't have some already, but in making these new Real Life (TM) friends I had less time for those online friends.
Tonight I am in one of those moods where I miss online friends. Probably because I miss real friends too, though I actually wonder if I still have real friends. (Real friends more or less equals someone to chat with.) I know it is just me being silly, but at 2am I figure some silliness is expected. But I remember nights of sitting up just as late as am up now and OMFG actually having someone to IM. What happened? Internet friends, where did you go?! I know some I've offended... others grew up (like me?), got jobs, got a life, got married, disappeared...
Oh this mood. It is all my fault. It started this way - I was feeling the need to extend myself into the world, reach out somehow. Maybe meet someone new on the interwebz. I mean, they can't all be bad, right?
Well, let me tell you, chatting.com isn't the place to go when you're looking for stimulating conversation. At least not intellectually stimulating conversation. And I'm very much not interested in conversations that are stimulating in a sense that isn't intellectual... at least not from anyone on chatting.com.
So after torturing myself with the idiot drivel of the masses, I decided to do something useful with my life and back up my livejournal because somehow through the grapevine I heard livejournal got rid of a bunch of employees and it might be smart to back this shit up. (insert booty shake here)
Found a site that apparently makes a .pdf "book" of your eljay, including comments (OMFG COMMENTS), but when I attempted to do it was told that there were too many users therefore I FAIL and should try again later.
That turns into me wondering if anyone I was friends with back in the day of deadjournal (O EMO HIGHSCHOOL ANGST DRAMA... I don't *really* miss you, do I?) still existed.
In short, the answer is no.
So, real friends. I have these people. I like them. They might like me. We have each other's screennames and apparently they're also online right now. We also read each other's livejournals, supposedly. Which are SO much less angsty than deadjournals (this entry is a total case in point).
Anyways, so friends. BUT WE NEVER TALK?!
You might be wondering why I'm bitching about this and yet I never comment on your livejournal, IM you, text or telephone you.
BECAUSE I AM A BAD FRIEND OKAY!
Actually, mostly because I am not a good friend, which isn't necessarily the same as a bad friend.
A bad friend is one who betrays you or something (is that even a friend, then?), which a not good friend is one who never attempts contact for fear of being an annoyance.
Or at least that's my reasoning.
That and the fact that I feel like I've been in too many one sided "friendships" to give a rat's ass anymore (rats asses are cute by the way, I had a pet rat named Magic once and her little patootie was adorable... not from up close but nothing is that cute up close...).
asdfasdfadsfadsf
brain stopped working..........
asdfasdferror
goodnight
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| because it's funny |
[02 Jan 2009|01:39am] |
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mood |
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tired |
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In 2009,  chironsoldier resolves to... Find a better nature.
Spend less time on fire.
Backup my anime regularly.
Go lightning three times a week.
Drink four glasses of mice every day.
Go to the rats every month.
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| Cally for nai aye! |
[26 Dec 2008|11:58pm] |
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mood |
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calm |
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I'm here, I'm safe. Also I'm tired!
Umm let's see. I don't have my own mode of transportation, so if you do and you want to hang out you're probably picking me up or coming to my place. Also tomorrow I guess I'm going to somewhere far away with my parents to have lunch with fam friends, and then the weekend after New Year's I'm also going far away with my parents, but to visit family. I will be calling and/or texting people tomorrow and throughout the week to discuss hanging out plans. Please also call or text me if you don't hear from me but want to!
PS I miss Dan okay!
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| Christmastime is here... |
[21 Dec 2008|11:29am] |
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mood |
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chipper |
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And it really is one word, too, "Christmastime."
It's snowing right now. It snowed all day yesterday! Like, inches of snow. People were skiing and sledding in the streets! Last night there was supposed to be frozen rain and sleet (which I now know the difference between thanks to the interwebz), but it didn't happen, at least in my neighborhood.
My parents just picked my Uncle up in Vacaville, CA and after they finish their meal at Denny's they will be on their way. My sister is already in Vancouver across the river, I think I will call her. I secretly hope I will get to see her more than the one day (Tues) that my parents and I have planned to hang out with her.
I have some presents wrapped, have most of them bought but still need to get a few more. I'm thinking most people in CA will forgive me for not having theirs already, since I won't be getting there until after Christmas anyways and will be able to actually go shopping since I'm sure the Tri-Valley's not covered with snow like Portland is.
I've been really pleased with my life lately. I feel responsible, because I've been working really hard to get the house cleaned up before my family arrives, and I've got presents for everyone in my family who I'll be seeing in the next few days (except my Sister... :/ Maybe I can find a Bed, Bath & Beyond gift card at Safeway when my parents get here with their big car and chains...). I washed the bathroom rugs and the blankets my Uncle will be using and everything. I just need to sweep the living room, change the sheet on the daybed where my Uncle will be sleeping (which I can do quickly when they get here), and de-clutter the living room table for the second time this week. I should probably also re-sweep the hall, since it's getting kinda gross again too. There is one way that I haven't been responsible - money... dun dun dun! I'm not in debt or anything, but I've probably been more generous in my life than I feel comfortable with. Also, the other day I got a call from one of my credit unions (yes, I have more than one. I don't need more than one, but I like having more the one so I do) about how I've been a month late paying off my credit card bill of like 15 cents. I didn't even realize I had money that needed to be paid off on my credit card, since I haven't used it since I moved here, but I paid it off that night and they didn't charge me any fees or anything so hurrah for an awesome credit union!
Anyways, time to go do all those chores. I will try to update again later about why I'm happy lately.
XOXO
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| Hello winter! |
[09 Dec 2008|03:00pm] |
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mood |
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satisfied |
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music |
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Dan talking on the phone to his boss |
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The days are cold and the nights are colder here in Portland. It has rained a lot less than I expected, and apparently less than it usually does at this time of year. We have actually gotten a few California-like days of blue skies and few clouds. Although I am grateful for the sun, I do appreciate the blanket-effect of clouds. When it is cloudy, I find it extremely hard to get out of bed. I think I've been sleeping like 10 hours/day here, usually getting to sleep around 2a and waking up between 10a and noon.
Because it hasn't been too rainy, I've actually been able to go out and explore some. Marissa (hi!) and I went out for a few hours after she got here and walked around downtown and in the south Park blocks area. Tomorrow we are going to go to the Museum of Contemporary Craft, and explore the Pearl District. Hopefully we'll make it to the Chinese botanical gardens too!
After a few months of sort-of looking, I finally found a job. I will be working with Americorps doing riparian habitat restoration in the nearby city of Gresham. My job doesn't start until Jan 22, so I am going to hitch a ride back to CA with my parents and visit there for awhile. Likely I'll head back up here around Dec 8 [edit: meant Jan 8, of course, otherwise I'd be coming back yesterday... x.X whoops], so's I can prepare for the beginning of work by getting an OR driver's license and settling car insurance/registration stuff.
I have made one solid friend since moving here. However, I've met up with another person, met someone while doing ivy-pulling at Tryon, and am planning on meeting up with another girl soon. I also joined meetup.com and will hopefully find some cool people and fun things to do that way.
I'm also going to try doing training to lead interpretive tours at Tryon State Park, like I did at Natural Bridges. I don't really know how that will work out, especially once I am working, but it doesn't hurt to try, right? For some reason, I'm really nervous about it. Kind of silly.
So, if the ball gets rolling on all these things I will probably be pretty busy. It will be an interesting contrast to the past few months, but I think it could be good for me to push myself a little, to become more active and social, though I do have to be careful about getting overstimulated.
I still haven't done any Christmas shopping. I need to remedy that. Perhaps tomorrow will be an opportunity.
I still miss all my friends (you people!) and family immensely, and am hoping to spend time with whoever is available and will have me when I get down there!
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chironsoldier's journal